The murder of the Krim kids is all over the news. Till now, I am dumbfounded by the thought some someone can hurt little children. As a parent, I mourn for their loss, because I myself would probably go insane if this tragedy happened to us, God forbid!
I've been following the story, and it's so heartbreaking to read that the elder child, Lulu tried to defend herself but was still stabbed in the stomach and neck. What's worse, both kids died a painfully as they bled to death. I cannot imagine what was going on during that time. Kids don't know that kind of pain. This is just too much. I hope the nanny wakes up, comes to her senses, and talk to the Krim parents to give them some sort of closure.
I don't judge Marina for hiring a nanny. I know how hard it is to raise kids. What is harder is when you don't have extended family who can help out. That's how life is in the US, unlike here in the Philippines where a village can raise a child.
Similar to her though, Sieg & I decided to raise our family away from our relatives. We also hired househelp to look after Rocco because I am a working mom. This tragedy got me thinking again if it's really safe having a yaya on board. Admittedly, I cannot do it all alone, so I have hired help. Though we have yayas, we're very cautious and always observe when red flags are flashing. So far, here's what we're doing:
1. We do not hire yayas from agencies. We hire from referrals. We need to know the person who will live with us, and care for our son. In our case, we know the families of our yayas. They both come from our province.
2. We hired two yayas. Both know how to take care of babies. Both know how to do household chores. Our house is not big, and can actually be managed by one. We hired two so that there is always a reliever. Looking after an active boy is tough and tiring. I don't want my yaya hurting my child just because she's lost her patience. They can always call a timeout.
3. We always observe how Rocco reacts to her yayas. If they treat him badly, we would know. So far, they've been so loving and playful to Rocco, and the little boy positively responds to them.
4. We also observe how the yayas are with Rocco. Do they have the natural protective instinct? Do they always frown or are grumpy? These can be tell-tale signs if something is off.
5. We are very kind and generous to our yayas. We give them dayoff will allowance, and all the possible perks that we can afford, we give to them.
6. However tired I am, I make it a point to be the one to bathe Rocco in the morning, and at night. This way I can check for bruises, pasa, or anything not normal. They know that I check that's why they are very open and immediately tell me if Rocco hit the floor, or got bitten, or what have you.
7. We censor words and actions. We don't allow bad words being spoken in the house. We don't allow words such as "bad ka" when they're addressing Rocco. We do not tolerate spanking.
So far, we've managed to build a household environment where the yayas are open with us, but they also know the rules. Of course we can never tell. No matter how good we are to yayas, sometimes they change, or snap, or do something bad, just like in the case of the Krim kids.
Speaking of which, because of this incident, it got me paranoid again. I think we also need to invest in CCTV cameras around the house. That is for our peace of mind.